Public Comment

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Name: Bill Jouris
Date: 27 Nov 2023
Other Comments

These comments pertain to Section IV: Definitions and Acronyms. (Note that I make these comments entirely in my personal and private capacity.)

There are several items here which, while probably clear to those steeped in ICANN-speak, may be less than transparent to other readers:

ToR: Terms of Reference -- Someone accustomed to standard (non-ICANN) English is likely to read this, as I did, with "Terms of Reference" = "Glossary". Of course, this document is nothing of the kind. It might therefore be useful to add a couple of sentences reflecting what ICANN means by "Terms of Reference"

SO/AC: Supporting Organization / Advisory Committee -- These two acronyms should probably be listed separately. For each acronym, in addition to giving the full name, it might be useful to add a list of what the relevant organizations are. Thus:

"AC: Advisory Committee. For example, At Large Advisory Committee (ALAC), Governmental Advisory Committee (GAC), Stability and Security Advisory Committee (SSAC), etc."

Likewise with the SOs.

Public comment -- in addition to what is here, perhaps a link to the actual Public Comment page:

Finally, I realize that the name of this effort is not really modifiable at this point. But it would nice to note somewhere that the Pilot Holistic Review defined here is not, in point of fact, a pilot. Rather, it is an attempt to use something vaguely similar to the Holistic Review Process to clarify certain aspects of the Holistic Review Process as currently outlined.

Summary of Submission

As written, Section IV: Definitions and Acronyms is clear only for someone who is already familiar ICANN and its way of wording things. (Who probably has minimal need for it.) The comment suggests a couple of places where unpacking further would result in greater transparency.